shalanna

I wish I were writing a battle scene or some other upheaval scene in my NaNo novel; if I had been doing that today, I would've had a lot of rich and conflicting emotion to draw upon. But at least I did keep myself calmer by escaping into the world of the novel.

Most people I've met today have said they're mostly just glad it's over. That was about the nastiest, most rancorous, most angry campaign I've ever seen, and there were so many dirty tricks going on and such fury on both sides . . . wow.

I still feel as if I've been jerked through a knothole backward. To be so close! (And 48 to 51 is very close; that's not a "mandate" for the one who won, just a "majority rules" slight majority.) But then I think how the Kerry campaign started out at a disadvantage, was under unfair and screaming attack from the bitter veterans who are angry that Kerry protested the other blunder-war when he got back, and then went under attack for all this other minor stuff (saying the VP's daughter is gay--well, she is a public figure and says she is and is openly gay, so if there's "nothing wrong with it," what's the prob?--and for favoring stem cell research, which would've been able to take us miles and miles with medical treatments.) It's amazing that they could ramp up to almost win and actually give a good scare to the incumbent side yesterday afternoon.

I don't think there's any blame to be laid on the Democratic candidates. They did nothing wrong. They were eloquent, elegant, on target, and had a great plan (IMHO). It's just that there are more people who want the other side. We are outnumbered. And honestly, there isn't THAT much ideological difference between the two sides; we must reach a common ground. We MUST enter into a dialogue. The President has never been one to reach across the aisle (not here in Texas or in his first term), so I'll be praying that Kerry and others can make the bipartisan thing happen. I'm really sad, but the people have spoken.

But anyhow, the worst part is that my elderly mother, her older sister (my "ancient aunt"), two of her close friends (retirees), and several other people I see often were VERY upset and in heartache all day. My husband proved to be pretty unhappy, too, though he had claimed it wouldn't make that much diff which person was in power. I kept saying, "Okay, now forget about it. You did your part, they fought the good fight, and now you should turn it to Turner Classic Movies and just zone out." Their blood pressure was bad and that took mine up. They couldn't disconnect quite so easily.

Honestly, it's a disappointment, and I feel that We The People really ripped ourselves off this time. I felt hope for a while there, which was great. Still, my life isn't going to be affected THAT much down here at the peon level by missing out on the various Kerry plans of action. The area of most concern for me is the personal freedoms/civil liberties stuff and freedom of speech (including the liberty to criticize the government and the decisions of the leaders without having people say we're traitors or we're aiding the enemy, because that is NOT the same thing at all.) What I can do about that is join the ACLU and the EFF (Electronic Frontier Foundation, which fights for online liberties and privacy.) But I hate the killing and destruction of the war. I'm a little worried about the economy and not thrilled about outsourcing (those call centers in India really irritate me; I can't make "Jack" understand what I called about, or I can't get a straight answer from "Jenny" about my software problems or what-have-you. Surely these jobs should be filled here!) But on the whole, we "look" like solid, churchgoing, upper-middle-income Republicans as far as our demographic. We aren't going to be disenfranchised, or it's not likely.

The most upsetting thing is that science is falling by the wayside. Stem cell research should be funded. Within five years, there could be a cure for diabetes. My husband and I have both developed Type 2 diabetes (NIDDM), my mother has just been diagnosed last year, and two-thirds of the people I know either have it or have a family member with it. Eep! Ron Reagan is trying to advocate for it. The few lines that we have now are contaminated with mouse cells (and who knows how that happened, but ick) and we need to develop the others. This would be a far better use of tax dollars than all those pork programs! These cells would never develop into people, so the argument put forth by the squeamish ones is false. (Also, they're allowing these six or so lines to be used, so their moral base falls apart--don't kill cells, except for THESE cells, it's OK?) I am determined that the administration needs to change its mind and help science find cures for MS, Alzheimer's, and all the disorders that stem cell research promises to decode and eliminate. This is more important than any mission to Mars (or in fact the current space program . . . I've come to think over the years that it's not all that important, but that's another story.)

The elderly people I dealt with today are worried about the Medicare cuts and privatization of Social Security that they've read about, and my aunt's doctor said today that her Medicare was going to quit paying for one of the blood tests she has to have done regularly. (I couldn't quite figure that one out, and haven't talked to my cousin to see whether she can straighten this bit out or look into it for my aunt.) Mostly there's a free-floating anxiety attack going on with those who wish things had come out differently.

Many of my acquaintances on the net who live differently from me (meaning that they're gay, disabled, not white-bread Christians, or some other form of "differentness") are very worried about what might happen to their rights in the next four years. But if the people in power are really Christians, as they SAY they are, then there won't be anything to worry about. I pray that they will remember to ask themselves what Jesus would do (and I mean that sincerely) when it comes down to oppressing someone or taking away needed health care or whatever (and they'd better really LISTEN to God and search their hearts, rather than just hiding behind the "religion" of it all and only pretending to understand what it really means.) If they see their brothers in sin, after all, the instruction is to "hate the sin, but love the sinner." (Note that I'm *not* saying these "different" people are sinners or in sin, but I *am* saying that if the so-pious types who go around judging others to be in the wrong don't make a distinction, they are not living the tenets of their own religion. Or else they don't really understand their own religion.) We are supposed to see everyone as God's children. "Feed My sheep," He says. "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." If you think people should live differently, then you are supposed to show them how to live by example. You are not supposed to go around putting people down and telling them all about their flaws, judging them in error (even though it says "judge not, lest ye be judged by the same standard," which means that if you are willing to be judged by that same standard, you can observe that something is wrong--but the way to make someone see they're in the wrong is NOT to go over and start a fight.) Greed should not rule. Self-interest takes a back seat to the greater good of all. Let's put an end to the judgments that some are tempted to make and show people that Christianity is a religion of love and hope.

You can translate that to "Pray for the enlightenment of all sentient beings," or however you see it. (That's what Ron Reagan said the other night.) I'm not trying to force anything on y'all, just pointing out that *if* the people who say they are sooooo religious really ARE (and I don't know one way or the other--only God knows the heart and can make that call), then the ones who are so fearful don't have to worry. We must hold on to that hope, that the faith of our leaders will prove to be a true faith that keeps them from doing whatever it is that the "disenfranchised" would be so hurt by. (Or that they'll wake up and stop doing it, whatever is damaging, be it war or what-have-you.) And we must pray for unity. Let there be peace on Earth, and let it begin with me . . . you . . . us!

Okay, it's after midnight--the Muse is about to kick in. (I'm a night owl. Hoot!)
Time to see what happens in the next chapter of the book I'm writing.